1From playboy Chance the nymph no longer flees
2since Elgin left his nostrils in the stone
3upon his old oak chest he cuts his cheese
4and loudly sang off-key without a tone

5Oh how oh how he hates such pilferings
6filching the lolly country thrift helped save
7the learning linguist cameramaniac sings
8to break a rule Britannia’s might might waive

9Staunch pilgrims longest journeys can’t depress
10with quill white-collared through his life will jog
11from cool Parnassus down to wild Loch Ness

12With breaking voice across the Alps they slog
13where no one bothered how one warmed one’s bum
14the bell tolls fee-less fi-less fo-less fum